This kinda bothers me...
Isn't wierd that at times, u try to help another person, but to the other person, he/she just doesn't understand and takes it the wrong way? I mean, ok... maybe i'm in no position to tell u what to do, but hey, opinions matter right? if it doesn't den i guess it really does not matter trying to talk to me about it... you just probably would want to talk to some fish or maybe a dog... at least you know they would listen and not answer u... really weird if u ask me... Hmmm...is it me? opinions anybody?
Sunday, November 28, 2004
Friday, November 26, 2004
Nobody's Home
its funny how this song kinda tickles me and makes me think... can't help but feel a sense of sadness when i hear this song and picture this girl.....
btw, shoutout to the angelus for the bbq!!! and the rest of my frens whom i've not had a chance to talk to for some time now... sorry guys, been really busy of late...i'll be back...i promise... ;)
I couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it everyday.
And I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make the same mistakes again.
What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
I's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Open your eyes and look outside, find a reasons why.
You've been rejected, and now you can't find what you left behind.
Be strong, be strong now.
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Her feelings she hides.
Her dreams she can't find.
She's losing her mind.
She's fallen behind.
She can't find her place.
She's losing her faith.
She's fallen from grace.
She's all over the place.
Yeah,oh
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
btw, shoutout to the angelus for the bbq!!! and the rest of my frens whom i've not had a chance to talk to for some time now... sorry guys, been really busy of late...i'll be back...i promise... ;)
I couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it everyday.
And I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make the same mistakes again.
What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
I's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Open your eyes and look outside, find a reasons why.
You've been rejected, and now you can't find what you left behind.
Be strong, be strong now.
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Her feelings she hides.
Her dreams she can't find.
She's losing her mind.
She's fallen behind.
She can't find her place.
She's losing her faith.
She's fallen from grace.
She's all over the place.
Yeah,oh
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
Monday, November 22, 2004
Sunday, November 14, 2004
Depression
Should it bother u that i'm alive or dead?
Would u even care?
To u, i'm just a fragment of your imagination,
an ancient piece of your past.
It won't matter to u even if i ended up in a hospital,
jail or even a cemetary.
You may think i'm just trying to get your sympathy with all tat i write here,
but the truth of the matter is that this is how i feel.
This is the feeling that i have been battling for the last half a year.
And till today, i know i'm still losing this fight.
Say what you want, say what u wish.
To me, as much as i want to get over it,
i know this will always be a piece of me that i cannot deny.
From the day you took my heart and crushed it,
ran away and disappeared from my life forever,
this i will always remember.
No amount of time can ever make me forget that,
as to say that nobody will ever take your place.
Though sad but true,
i still love you.
No matter what you've done or how u see me,
I will always look at u and tell myself,
That for that brief moment in time,
I had that chance to love u.
Though far and wide the distance might be now,
soon in time will come that day,
whereby all the things will come back to stay.
ok, i'm depressed....again.... just came back from edna's place. was just suppposed to help her fix her computer, but i guess i just could not control all that pent up emotion inside of me. which sadly i know, some questions will never have the answers to...
Would u even care?
To u, i'm just a fragment of your imagination,
an ancient piece of your past.
It won't matter to u even if i ended up in a hospital,
jail or even a cemetary.
You may think i'm just trying to get your sympathy with all tat i write here,
but the truth of the matter is that this is how i feel.
This is the feeling that i have been battling for the last half a year.
And till today, i know i'm still losing this fight.
Say what you want, say what u wish.
To me, as much as i want to get over it,
i know this will always be a piece of me that i cannot deny.
From the day you took my heart and crushed it,
ran away and disappeared from my life forever,
this i will always remember.
No amount of time can ever make me forget that,
as to say that nobody will ever take your place.
Though sad but true,
i still love you.
No matter what you've done or how u see me,
I will always look at u and tell myself,
That for that brief moment in time,
I had that chance to love u.
Though far and wide the distance might be now,
soon in time will come that day,
whereby all the things will come back to stay.
ok, i'm depressed....again.... just came back from edna's place. was just suppposed to help her fix her computer, but i guess i just could not control all that pent up emotion inside of me. which sadly i know, some questions will never have the answers to...
Thursday, November 11, 2004
I miss you...
I miss my frens
I miss my family
I miss all whom i've passed
I miss all those i've known in my life
I miss love
I miss being in love
I miss loving one person to death
I miss all the times
I miss me
Just what else could i miss?
I miss my family
I miss all whom i've passed
I miss all those i've known in my life
I miss love
I miss being in love
I miss loving one person to death
I miss all the times
I miss me
Just what else could i miss?
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
Its over...
*sigh*
Not going to KL anymore... Charmain has got something on and so do i... so have to postphone the trip....ah well, its not all that bad... always save the best for last...next time maybe...
Anyway, the first exco just finished on monday... not bad... though i nearly got knocked out by the end of the night... talk about tiring man...
My damn cpu is gettin slower and slower... think i have to reformat it again... but problem is i have too much data inside... WAH!!!1die man... just took out all the mp3's and backed it up into the mobile hard disk... never realised i had so much mp3s.. about 14.1 GB worth in al... shitz man... next to go is all my videos... currently, have about 11.8 GB worth of it...not to mention a whole stack of cds that i have already backed up into... wow, i starting to feel like some ah beng running an illegal vcd and mp3 business.... hehe...piracy rulez man...hehe....
kays, going to meet the kids later for lunch as well as maybe some pool... yups... so toodles... blog another day....
Not going to KL anymore... Charmain has got something on and so do i... so have to postphone the trip....ah well, its not all that bad... always save the best for last...next time maybe...
Anyway, the first exco just finished on monday... not bad... though i nearly got knocked out by the end of the night... talk about tiring man...
My damn cpu is gettin slower and slower... think i have to reformat it again... but problem is i have too much data inside... WAH!!!1die man... just took out all the mp3's and backed it up into the mobile hard disk... never realised i had so much mp3s.. about 14.1 GB worth in al... shitz man... next to go is all my videos... currently, have about 11.8 GB worth of it...not to mention a whole stack of cds that i have already backed up into... wow, i starting to feel like some ah beng running an illegal vcd and mp3 business.... hehe...piracy rulez man...hehe....
kays, going to meet the kids later for lunch as well as maybe some pool... yups... so toodles... blog another day....
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Its been a long time....
HEYLO!!!! To all that missed me, i missed u too....to all who dun, well, i miss u too...hehe...
so sorry i haven't been blogging for ages.... its just that work has been KILLING ME!!!!! been absolutely exhausted for the last week and come to think of it, i still have about a year to go before the stupid NDP05 is over... DAMN!!!
Anyway, there have been lots of things happening recently... Roch got himself into some trouble of late, which to me is pure stupidity...not roch, but the other person he is in conflict with.... All i can say is that it amazes me at times how incredibly stupid the human brain can be..(or is it just the person?)
roch, whatever it is, i'll be just a phonecall away and if u need me, i'll mobilise the army for u...hehe... on a more serious note, i've been in the position you are in and i understand that it really sucks... but hey, be brave and follow your own rules... it never fails...
planning to go on abroad again, though this time, it might not materialize, as been having certain cashflow problems of late...(den again, who doesn't?) hopefully can get it resolved asap... really sucks to go out and have no cash...
I seriouly think i need to get into another relationship... anyone interested? (juz kidding...)cuz my life is going back into that monotonous state again... nowadays, i stay in late in the office, looking for something to do... hey, it beats going home early and having nothing to do at all.... hmmm maybe, its just me...being a homebody isn't really my cup of tea....
Too lazy to blog now... need lots of rest... damn tired....
so sorry i haven't been blogging for ages.... its just that work has been KILLING ME!!!!! been absolutely exhausted for the last week and come to think of it, i still have about a year to go before the stupid NDP05 is over... DAMN!!!
Anyway, there have been lots of things happening recently... Roch got himself into some trouble of late, which to me is pure stupidity...not roch, but the other person he is in conflict with.... All i can say is that it amazes me at times how incredibly stupid the human brain can be..(or is it just the person?)
roch, whatever it is, i'll be just a phonecall away and if u need me, i'll mobilise the army for u...hehe... on a more serious note, i've been in the position you are in and i understand that it really sucks... but hey, be brave and follow your own rules... it never fails...
planning to go on abroad again, though this time, it might not materialize, as been having certain cashflow problems of late...(den again, who doesn't?) hopefully can get it resolved asap... really sucks to go out and have no cash...
I seriouly think i need to get into another relationship... anyone interested? (juz kidding...)cuz my life is going back into that monotonous state again... nowadays, i stay in late in the office, looking for something to do... hey, it beats going home early and having nothing to do at all.... hmmm maybe, its just me...being a homebody isn't really my cup of tea....
Too lazy to blog now... need lots of rest... damn tired....
Thursday, October 28, 2004
Saturday, October 23, 2004
BLURRY
Been feeling a bit screwy these few days.... lots have happened and boy is it overwhelming... kinda starting to believe that this thing called love in this world is absolutely rubbish....
Anyways, was listening to some old songs recently and came across this song.....
"Blurry"
Everything's so blurry
and everyone's so fake
and everybody's empty
and everything is so messed up
pre-occupied without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl
You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i'll protect you
from all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing
imagine where you are
there's oceans in between us
but that's not very far
Can you take it all away
can you take it all away
well ya shoved it in my face
this pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away
can you take it all away
well ya shoved it my face
Everyone is changing
there's noone left that's real
to make up your own ending
and let me know just how you feel
cause I am lost without you
I cannot live at all
my whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl
You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i will save you
from all of the unclean
I wonder what you're doing
I wonder where you are
There's oceans in between us
but that's not very far
[Chorus]
Nobody told me what you thought
nobody told me what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
told you when to runaway
nobody told you where to hide
nobody told you what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
showed you when to runaway
[Chorus]
This pain you gave to me
You take it all
You take it all away...
This pain you gave to me
You take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Ironically, i was listening to this song as well when i was stabbed in the heart...
Ah, the irony of it all....
Anyways, was listening to some old songs recently and came across this song.....
"Blurry"
Everything's so blurry
and everyone's so fake
and everybody's empty
and everything is so messed up
pre-occupied without you
I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl
You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i'll protect you
from all of the obscene
I wonder what you're doing
imagine where you are
there's oceans in between us
but that's not very far
Can you take it all away
can you take it all away
well ya shoved it in my face
this pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away
can you take it all away
well ya shoved it my face
Everyone is changing
there's noone left that's real
to make up your own ending
and let me know just how you feel
cause I am lost without you
I cannot live at all
my whole world surrounds you
I stumble then I crawl
You could be my someone
you could be my scene
you know that i will save you
from all of the unclean
I wonder what you're doing
I wonder where you are
There's oceans in between us
but that's not very far
[Chorus]
Nobody told me what you thought
nobody told me what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
told you when to runaway
nobody told you where to hide
nobody told you what to say
everyone showed you where to turn
showed you when to runaway
[Chorus]
This pain you gave to me
You take it all
You take it all away...
This pain you gave to me
You take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Ironically, i was listening to this song as well when i was stabbed in the heart...
Ah, the irony of it all....
Thursday, October 21, 2004
oh my gawwwd. melly.! what have i told you about updating your blog.!
haiyo. never learrrn.
hello! oh. mel. help me.my blog. is craaaap. asked my friend to help me. and she screwed it up! its emily the strange. and its blackkk. it soooo doesnt go. its not me. ahhh. couldnt she have just put the white onee??? ahh.. i cant change it.. she comes to my blog.. then she'll wonder [if i change it] why i changed it. then she'll think its because i dont like it.[ wll thats true.] but after that she'll be hurttttt. howwwww? oh dammit. its sooo ugly.
help me pass a msg to her? say..i think it'll be nice with the whiiite background. with the whiiite emily. with a blaccck font. yes.! tell her that. dont say i said it. say you think. nonono.! go to my blog and tagg. my goodness pat. what happend to your blog.??? ewww. okayyy? haha. i cant even blog all this in my owwwn blog. she'll read it!!
thanks for telling me your id and pw. heeheee.pluss thanks for letting me invade! again!
Thursday, October 14, 2004
Today
Just got back from work and have to report back to work tomorrow morning at 8 again... talk about a monotonous life man...
Trying to look wiser....Emphasis on the word 'trying'...
Anywayz, gave the best piece of advice today. " Life is too short to be fearful of living each day." I really have no idea what came over me when i said that... Maybe it was cuz i was half asleep on the bus.. and the best part is, it didn't strike me until julia thanked me for that..
Come to think of it, it is to a certain extent, very true.. Honestly, although i'm only 22, i know i know, not that old... but still, i feel as though i have lived a life and am gettin slowly sick of it.. There are times whereby i get up in the morning, not wanting to face the day ahead, due to many unexplainable reasons...And i'm sure there are many more people out there feeling exactly the same way i do... The funny thing is, if at the age of 22 i feel this, den how would i feel when i reach, say 42? would i still get up, feeling all sucky and fucked up? Afraid to face the day ahead? Kinda makes u wonder huh?
So, my conclusion is well, live life in the direction u think you can find your happiness. There will be obstacles along the way, but then again, nobody ever said the road was gonna be easy...Once you manage to overcome them, it will only make u stronger and wiser... Listen to all the advices and criticism that come your way, but most importantly, listen to yourself.. aLways ask yorself, "Is this what i REALLY want?" Cuz nobody can lead you to YOUR happiness besides you yourself....
Do what you feel is right...yes, feel...not think.. there is a distinct difference between the brain and the heart... one is a pure feeling, the other is pure logic... but ironically, both are correct in their own ways... A Warrant Officer in the army once told me 3 simple words that make a lot of sense although its very common... "JUST DO IT" Live life with no regrets on knowing you've done everything you ever wanted to do... If u always wanted to do something but felt very embarassed to do so, i urge u to do it.. Cuz u will never know how it will change your life in one way or another...
By saying that, i would just like to challenge you to a task whereby most of us would find very hard to do... For a change, go up to your mumsy or dadsy and tell them you love them.. Ironically, as much as we know we do love them, its the hardest thing to say (Other than sorry of course).. U up for the challenge?
Trying to look wiser....Emphasis on the word 'trying'...
Anywayz, gave the best piece of advice today. " Life is too short to be fearful of living each day." I really have no idea what came over me when i said that... Maybe it was cuz i was half asleep on the bus.. and the best part is, it didn't strike me until julia thanked me for that..
Come to think of it, it is to a certain extent, very true.. Honestly, although i'm only 22, i know i know, not that old... but still, i feel as though i have lived a life and am gettin slowly sick of it.. There are times whereby i get up in the morning, not wanting to face the day ahead, due to many unexplainable reasons...And i'm sure there are many more people out there feeling exactly the same way i do... The funny thing is, if at the age of 22 i feel this, den how would i feel when i reach, say 42? would i still get up, feeling all sucky and fucked up? Afraid to face the day ahead? Kinda makes u wonder huh?
So, my conclusion is well, live life in the direction u think you can find your happiness. There will be obstacles along the way, but then again, nobody ever said the road was gonna be easy...Once you manage to overcome them, it will only make u stronger and wiser... Listen to all the advices and criticism that come your way, but most importantly, listen to yourself.. aLways ask yorself, "Is this what i REALLY want?" Cuz nobody can lead you to YOUR happiness besides you yourself....
Do what you feel is right...yes, feel...not think.. there is a distinct difference between the brain and the heart... one is a pure feeling, the other is pure logic... but ironically, both are correct in their own ways... A Warrant Officer in the army once told me 3 simple words that make a lot of sense although its very common... "JUST DO IT" Live life with no regrets on knowing you've done everything you ever wanted to do... If u always wanted to do something but felt very embarassed to do so, i urge u to do it.. Cuz u will never know how it will change your life in one way or another...
By saying that, i would just like to challenge you to a task whereby most of us would find very hard to do... For a change, go up to your mumsy or dadsy and tell them you love them.. Ironically, as much as we know we do love them, its the hardest thing to say (Other than sorry of course).. U up for the challenge?
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
Arab Street
Amanda, Roch, Julia & Joanne
Went down to Arab street with Amanda, Joanne & Roch. Went over to this shop "Made in Japan", that sells second hand stuff at really cheap prices.. In the end, bought 3 shirst for like $10... Good & cheap... hehe... ended up smoking xisha!!!! :P
Need more days like this man...
Wats Roch doin?
Saturday, October 09, 2004
......
just came back from work... on duty again last night... bored as uaual like hell in camp...plus the fact that it was raining cats & dogs didn't help...
trying like hell to stay awake now... cuz have to go church later... dun wanna end up going late again... always end up doing that of late....Hmmmm
Blog later larhz.... cannot tahna already..think i'm gonna say hi to my bed for a while...
Later..
trying like hell to stay awake now... cuz have to go church later... dun wanna end up going late again... always end up doing that of late....Hmmmm
Blog later larhz.... cannot tahna already..think i'm gonna say hi to my bed for a while...
Later..
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Busy like hell!!!!
been too busy and tired these few days to blog...
Charmain was real sweet... she bought me a present as well as made a lovely card for my birthday.. so touched man... Thanks chump!!!
Went swimming with Julia over the weekend... prior to that, dun think i've been in the water for nearly a yr... Man its been a long time...Hmmm... should make this a habit... at least its better than jogging...hehe!! After that, it was dinner at Swensens!!! Mmmm.... that was nice....
Die lah!!! and seriously going broke... got to figure out some way to cut down on my expenses... for those of ya who know me well enough, you know i spend more than i earn!!!! hehe... THAT HAS GOT TO STOP!!!!
List of things that have to be done:
1. Pay $500 to Informatics Computer School to take my FINAL module.
2. Plan for another trip abroad hopefully @ end of the month or next.
3. Go renew my PDL
4. Go apply at BBDC/SSDC for my advanced theory as well as practical lessons.
These 4 things alone already giving me a big headache... not to mention the amount of bills every month....
ARRGGHHH!!!!!
Charmain was real sweet... she bought me a present as well as made a lovely card for my birthday.. so touched man... Thanks chump!!!
Went swimming with Julia over the weekend... prior to that, dun think i've been in the water for nearly a yr... Man its been a long time...Hmmm... should make this a habit... at least its better than jogging...hehe!! After that, it was dinner at Swensens!!! Mmmm.... that was nice....
Die lah!!! and seriously going broke... got to figure out some way to cut down on my expenses... for those of ya who know me well enough, you know i spend more than i earn!!!! hehe... THAT HAS GOT TO STOP!!!!
List of things that have to be done:
1. Pay $500 to Informatics Computer School to take my FINAL module.
2. Plan for another trip abroad hopefully @ end of the month or next.
3. Go renew my PDL
4. Go apply at BBDC/SSDC for my advanced theory as well as practical lessons.
These 4 things alone already giving me a big headache... not to mention the amount of bills every month....
ARRGGHHH!!!!!
Tuesday, October 05, 2004
Sunday, October 03, 2004
hellos.. im just bored lahh. anyways. now mel is in gv yishun. watching hmm.. i forgot what show. yes. he didnt tell me to blog for him. im just bored. sorry mellys. and thankies yeah? [[[[[[[[[[: smiles. waiit. too many smiles alr.. more smiles in the night yeah? kays. ooo.ya. the movie is resident evilll.. the second one.. yupps. anyways. good nights people. bye!
Thursday, September 30, 2004
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