The insomniac nights are over for now.... NOT!!!!!
for the last few weeks, it was because of work... now, its just cause i can't seem to sleep... only can seem to do that in the morning when i reach work... so its kinda like i dun sleep the whole night, or should i say, try but fail to sleep for the whole night, before stumbling to work early in the morning, with a face lower than droopy's and scarier than a zombie's....
Was with the Adventus crew 2 weeks ago @ Mdm Wongs.. That was a blast... witnessed a whole drunk fest right after in their office... hehe... no worries... nothing wrong was done... hehe...Just seeing them having so much fun makes me want to go out to the private sector and work as well... oh well, have to wait at least 4 more years before i can even think about it...
Patience is a virtue... Shall keep telling myself that for the next 4 years at least.....
Last friday, liquid room with carole, roch and debz... after such a long time, debz makes an appearence back in Yishun.... ok for those who are a bit lost, debz is my childhood/ex girlfren.... nowadays, she stays with her boyfren in pasir ris.... which is really a good thing, if you ask mostof s who know her since young.... anyways, not to digress... back to liquid rm... although house music has never been my thingy, soomehow, i always enjoy the music when i'm at liquid rm...
maybe its the alcohol.....
Mainey's party at rouge on sat was really a blast.... to me at least, cuz its been a while since i saw her... last christmas actually... hehe... always nice to meet up once in a while...went with mandy and andi.... oh and kenny and mel were also there.... how i miss the company.... got really high thatnight... too much alcohol at one go... but den again, too much is never enough...hehe....
So for now, i shall lay awakw and figure out how to solve this insomniac problem... rambling about the drinking in the past few weeks ain't helping cuz ny brain is kinda braindead for now.... just like opening my eyes but not thinking about anything at all....
work.....zzzzz......zzzzz......zzzzzz.....wth?!
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
NDP 2005
The first media launch is over... Finally.... Please everybody, do me a great big favour and go to the NDP Website . As i am personally involved in the maintanence of it, i would require you guys to help me critic the site...
In the meantime, time to spend sometime with corrinne... this NDP has been taking up too much of our time...hehe...
In the meantime, time to spend sometime with corrinne... this NDP has been taking up too much of our time...hehe...
Saturday, March 26, 2005
Rambles
i swear!!!!! work is absolutely killing me... least the fact that the company that is helping out is located right smack in the middle of mohd sultan... preeety convenient if you ask me...hehe
Anyways, been too damn busy with the preparations for NDP... too damn busy for anything... even my girlfren!!! ok(hands up!!), i admit i've been neglecting her quite a bit but hey, i can't help it right? dun even have time to go home to sleep, let alone spend time with her!!! well, glad she understnds(i hope)... u know women and their " i understand, dun worry" and den go on making a big fuss out of nothing at all... i do realise i will offend some people by saying that but hey, the truth hurts right? hehe... no offense to anybody la...
But in the midst of all that, i think a slight problem is developing within me... actually, i think it has been there all this while but i just always kinda shrugged it off... i think i'm having some kind of sleeping disorder!!!(HELP!!!!) thank god my boss is understanding.... can't seem to stay awake in the day and can't sleep to sleep at night.... goodness!!!! what the hell is wrong with me?
Oh well, taking a break just for these few days.... hopefully can get something done by the time i get back to work...
ahhh.... work.....
Anyways, been too damn busy with the preparations for NDP... too damn busy for anything... even my girlfren!!! ok(hands up!!), i admit i've been neglecting her quite a bit but hey, i can't help it right? dun even have time to go home to sleep, let alone spend time with her!!! well, glad she understnds(i hope)... u know women and their " i understand, dun worry" and den go on making a big fuss out of nothing at all... i do realise i will offend some people by saying that but hey, the truth hurts right? hehe... no offense to anybody la...
But in the midst of all that, i think a slight problem is developing within me... actually, i think it has been there all this while but i just always kinda shrugged it off... i think i'm having some kind of sleeping disorder!!!(HELP!!!!) thank god my boss is understanding.... can't seem to stay awake in the day and can't sleep to sleep at night.... goodness!!!! what the hell is wrong with me?
Oh well, taking a break just for these few days.... hopefully can get something done by the time i get back to work...
ahhh.... work.....
Food for thought?
We were made such a perfect creature.
With the ability to upgrade by will of the nature.
With the brains to create even other creatures.
But given the heart just to keep us from overtaking the creator.
Our beginnings from a humble form till the endings of gigantic evolution and in bet is our actions based on our judgemental emotion.
Deep man....
With the ability to upgrade by will of the nature.
With the brains to create even other creatures.
But given the heart just to keep us from overtaking the creator.
Our beginnings from a humble form till the endings of gigantic evolution and in bet is our actions based on our judgemental emotion.
Deep man....
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
The end of another day
It has come to the end of another working day in the office....
Man, i got up this morning staring at a mini depression... Maybe i was a woman in my previous life... Sometimes i feel like that... I wonder why?? maybe its cuz i got up late again and was late for work again... Giving the excuse that i was going to the bank was my ' Break Glass in Case of Emergency ' Plan... Luckily i found no need for it... I guess that is what i love about my office these days... Compared to the days when i first started working there, whereby i had eyes on me, watching my every move and being at the wrong place at the wrong time always.... Thus getting unreasonable punishments always.. Nowadays, evasion has become sort of an artform for me... The only bad thing for me and as usual, my conscience... Feel kinda bad for going late to work... I mean, others make it to work early in the morning and there are arses like me, who just take their time and dun bother at all about how late they arrive at work... As lam hasa told me before, if this were the coporate world, i wouldn't be able to survive even a week, with the current mindset i have now... He makes sense you know... Haiz....
Corrinne has been waking me up every morning...Literally... The poor girl goes to sch early in the morning, and tries her very best to wake me up in the morning... I feel so bad cuz i always sleep so soundly, dead to the world... so you can imagine how many times she calls and calls, but there is just no answer.... Darling, i'm really sorry... I think there's a problem with me... I'm sick in a funny kind of way....
Man, i got up this morning staring at a mini depression... Maybe i was a woman in my previous life... Sometimes i feel like that... I wonder why?? maybe its cuz i got up late again and was late for work again... Giving the excuse that i was going to the bank was my ' Break Glass in Case of Emergency ' Plan... Luckily i found no need for it... I guess that is what i love about my office these days... Compared to the days when i first started working there, whereby i had eyes on me, watching my every move and being at the wrong place at the wrong time always.... Thus getting unreasonable punishments always.. Nowadays, evasion has become sort of an artform for me... The only bad thing for me and as usual, my conscience... Feel kinda bad for going late to work... I mean, others make it to work early in the morning and there are arses like me, who just take their time and dun bother at all about how late they arrive at work... As lam hasa told me before, if this were the coporate world, i wouldn't be able to survive even a week, with the current mindset i have now... He makes sense you know... Haiz....
Corrinne has been waking me up every morning...Literally... The poor girl goes to sch early in the morning, and tries her very best to wake me up in the morning... I feel so bad cuz i always sleep so soundly, dead to the world... so you can imagine how many times she calls and calls, but there is just no answer.... Darling, i'm really sorry... I think there's a problem with me... I'm sick in a funny kind of way....
Sunday, March 06, 2005
Food for Thought..
The Board Meeting had come to an end. Bob started to stand up and jostled the table, spilling his coffee over his notes. "How embarrassing. I am getting so clumsy in my old age."
Everyone had a good laugh, and soon we were all telling stories of our most embarrassing moments. It came around to Frank who sat quietly listening to the others. Someone said, "Come on, Frank. Tell us your most embarrassing moment."
Frank laughed and began to tell us of his childhood. "I grew up in San Pedro. My Dad was a fisherman, and he loved the sea. He had his own boat, but it was hard making a living on the sea. He worked hard and would stay out until he caught enough to feed the family. Not just enough for our family, but also for his Mom and Dad and the other kids that were still at home."
He looked at us and said, "I wish you could have met my Dad. He was a big man, and he was strong from pulling the nets and fighting the seas for his catch. When you got close to him, he smelled like the ocean. He would wear his old canvas, foul-weather coat and his bibbed overalls. His rain hat would be pulled down over his brow. No matter how much my Mother washed them, they would still smell of the sea and of fish."
Frank's voice dropped a bit. "When the weather was bad he would drive me to school. He had this old truck that he used in his fishing business. That truck was older than he was. It would wheeze and rattle down the road. You could hear it coming for blocks. As he would drive toward the school,I would shrink down into the seat hoping to disappear. Half the time, he would slam to a stop and the old truck would belch a cloud of smoke. He would pull right up in front, and it seemed like everybody would be standing around and watching. Then he would lean over and give me a big kiss on the cheek and tell me to be a good boy. It was so embarrassing for me. Here, I was twelve years old, and my Dad would lean over and kiss me goodbye!"
He paused and then went on, "I remember the day I decided I was too old for a goodbye kiss. When we got to the school and came to a stop, he had his usual big smile. He started to lean toward me, but I put my hand up and said, 'No, Dad.'
It was the first time I had ever talked to him that way, and he had this surprised look on his face.
I said, 'Dad, I'm too old for a goodbye kiss. I'm too old for any kind of kiss.'
My Dad looked at me for the longest time, and his eyes started to tear up. I had never seen him cry. He turned and looked out the windshield. 'You're right,' he said. 'You are a big boy....a man. I won't kiss you anymore.'"
Frank got a funny look on his face, and the tears began to well up in his eyes, as he spoke. "It wasn't long after that when my Dad went to sea and never came back. It was a day when most of the fleet stayed in, but not Dad. He had a big family to feed. They found his boat adrift with its nets half in and half out. He must have gotten into a gale and was trying to save the nets and the floats."
I looked at Frank and saw that tears were running down his cheeks. Frank spoke again. "Guys, you don't know what I would give to have my Dad give me just one more kiss on the cheek....to feel his rough old face....to smell the ocean on him....to feel his arm around my neck. I wish I had been a man then. If I had been a man, I would never have told my Dad I was too old for a goodbye kiss."
Everyone had a good laugh, and soon we were all telling stories of our most embarrassing moments. It came around to Frank who sat quietly listening to the others. Someone said, "Come on, Frank. Tell us your most embarrassing moment."
Frank laughed and began to tell us of his childhood. "I grew up in San Pedro. My Dad was a fisherman, and he loved the sea. He had his own boat, but it was hard making a living on the sea. He worked hard and would stay out until he caught enough to feed the family. Not just enough for our family, but also for his Mom and Dad and the other kids that were still at home."
He looked at us and said, "I wish you could have met my Dad. He was a big man, and he was strong from pulling the nets and fighting the seas for his catch. When you got close to him, he smelled like the ocean. He would wear his old canvas, foul-weather coat and his bibbed overalls. His rain hat would be pulled down over his brow. No matter how much my Mother washed them, they would still smell of the sea and of fish."
Frank's voice dropped a bit. "When the weather was bad he would drive me to school. He had this old truck that he used in his fishing business. That truck was older than he was. It would wheeze and rattle down the road. You could hear it coming for blocks. As he would drive toward the school,I would shrink down into the seat hoping to disappear. Half the time, he would slam to a stop and the old truck would belch a cloud of smoke. He would pull right up in front, and it seemed like everybody would be standing around and watching. Then he would lean over and give me a big kiss on the cheek and tell me to be a good boy. It was so embarrassing for me. Here, I was twelve years old, and my Dad would lean over and kiss me goodbye!"
He paused and then went on, "I remember the day I decided I was too old for a goodbye kiss. When we got to the school and came to a stop, he had his usual big smile. He started to lean toward me, but I put my hand up and said, 'No, Dad.'
It was the first time I had ever talked to him that way, and he had this surprised look on his face.
I said, 'Dad, I'm too old for a goodbye kiss. I'm too old for any kind of kiss.'
My Dad looked at me for the longest time, and his eyes started to tear up. I had never seen him cry. He turned and looked out the windshield. 'You're right,' he said. 'You are a big boy....a man. I won't kiss you anymore.'"
Frank got a funny look on his face, and the tears began to well up in his eyes, as he spoke. "It wasn't long after that when my Dad went to sea and never came back. It was a day when most of the fleet stayed in, but not Dad. He had a big family to feed. They found his boat adrift with its nets half in and half out. He must have gotten into a gale and was trying to save the nets and the floats."
I looked at Frank and saw that tears were running down his cheeks. Frank spoke again. "Guys, you don't know what I would give to have my Dad give me just one more kiss on the cheek....to feel his rough old face....to smell the ocean on him....to feel his arm around my neck. I wish I had been a man then. If I had been a man, I would never have told my Dad I was too old for a goodbye kiss."
Its been a long time....REAL LONG!!!
ok firstly, sorry for not blogging so long.... been busy as hell of late so blogging was not really the top of my agenda....
Anyways, Lets start with with yesterday... As our dear patriotic Gabriel was flying off today(Wait, i think he has already flown!), the whole gin gang met up at wala wala last night... Talk about a big group... 4 tables full... It was kinda like an angelus choir reunion with a whole bunch of former members.... hehe... anyways, here's who came...
Me ( :) )
Amanda
Gabriel
Chris
Robin
Noel
Jeremy
Mitsuye
Sarah
Joanne Sandhu
Roch
Maryanne
Edna
Jayet
On looking at that list, i feel i damn loser man.... in that whole, i'm probably the only ass in the world with 2 ex girlfreinds in that list.... man, i feel weird.....
Anyways, hung out at wala wala till about 2 plus when the place closed... after much disussion, we ended in zouk... where the gals partied as hell and the guys sat at wine bar to chill... feels damn good to be able to catch up with all of them again... :)
Den, later in the morning, tragedy struck....for me at least... jayet got herself pissed drunk... ended up having to send her home with amanda and rob... well, no biggie... but in the midst of doing that, i lost my damn phone!!!! nows thats the sad part... haiz, had to suspend my line and get another sim card.... All my contacts lost!!!!! damn sad man.....
Well, today, corrinne had some dance competition at suntec... being me, sadly, i woke up a wee bit late and missed it... however, thankfully, corrinne managed to get it on video... man was i impressed... they were good... looks like all that hard work did pay off.... but sadly, the judges thought otherwise... Blind idiots!!!! The winning group performed again at the end and looking at it, i must say, WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING????!!!!Haiz, justice is blind.......
Have to go to work in a few hours time so hopefully, i'll keep up this blogging habit again....otherwise, this site becoming a bit of a white elephant huh?? Take care yall!!!
Anyways, Lets start with with yesterday... As our dear patriotic Gabriel was flying off today(Wait, i think he has already flown!), the whole gin gang met up at wala wala last night... Talk about a big group... 4 tables full... It was kinda like an angelus choir reunion with a whole bunch of former members.... hehe... anyways, here's who came...
Me ( :) )
Amanda
Gabriel
Chris
Robin
Noel
Jeremy
Mitsuye
Sarah
Joanne Sandhu
Roch
Maryanne
Edna
Jayet
On looking at that list, i feel i damn loser man.... in that whole, i'm probably the only ass in the world with 2 ex girlfreinds in that list.... man, i feel weird.....
Anyways, hung out at wala wala till about 2 plus when the place closed... after much disussion, we ended in zouk... where the gals partied as hell and the guys sat at wine bar to chill... feels damn good to be able to catch up with all of them again... :)
Den, later in the morning, tragedy struck....for me at least... jayet got herself pissed drunk... ended up having to send her home with amanda and rob... well, no biggie... but in the midst of doing that, i lost my damn phone!!!! nows thats the sad part... haiz, had to suspend my line and get another sim card.... All my contacts lost!!!!! damn sad man.....
Well, today, corrinne had some dance competition at suntec... being me, sadly, i woke up a wee bit late and missed it... however, thankfully, corrinne managed to get it on video... man was i impressed... they were good... looks like all that hard work did pay off.... but sadly, the judges thought otherwise... Blind idiots!!!! The winning group performed again at the end and looking at it, i must say, WHAT THE HELL WERE THEY THINKING????!!!!Haiz, justice is blind.......
Have to go to work in a few hours time so hopefully, i'll keep up this blogging habit again....otherwise, this site becoming a bit of a white elephant huh?? Take care yall!!!
Monday, February 21, 2005
hehe
as u can tell, i'm on a massive blogging spree.... just finished range and came back to the office to check my mails and felt i should post some of the stuff i get from people which i find interesting, inspiring or just absolutely hilarious or stupid... check out my other blog too as i have posted some intere... can't possibly post so many here right, although i think i have already posted like 15 of it already..hehe...
Dear Bruce
this was extracted from "Dear Bruce", an Australian 'Agony Aunt' column in a popular men's magazine....
Q. Dear Bruce I have some lucky condoms that I keep in my wallet. I am beginning to wonder if they really are lucky, as they have been there for two months
A. Jesus mate, no worries. Men only use rubbers when they are sober anyway. Guess that means you've been pissed for two months which makes you one lucky bastard! Just on a medical note - rubbers are good idea to use when you do an Abo, as they are smelly bastards, Oh and 'roos too, helps avoid bush rash.
Q. Dear Bruce my girlfriend got upset when I suggested I use an old girlfriend's vibrator on her.
A. No worries. I've seen this before. Women need reassuring. Tell the stupid bitch that you have cleaned it since you last used it. Sometimes Sheila's get hung up on hygiene.
Q. Dear Bruce I gave my sister one and now she wants me to do it to her mate.
A. Errr... mate you're from Tasmania right? No worries mate, as long as her mate is a Sheila it's ok.
Q. Dear Bruce, After my last Hockey game I got an erection in the showers. Is this normal, I am a single guy and like girls.
A. Nah mate you're queer. Only poofters play hockey.
Q. Dear Bruce, my wife says I don't use enough lubricant before we have sex.
A. Exactly how many beers are you drinking before you root her?
Q. Dear Bruce, I am beginning to suspect I am gay. I wear leather trousers and have just grown a Freddie Mercury moustache. I don't know who to turn to.
A. Get a grip of yourself man. Face facts, be logical: You're a raving poofter, no one likes you, get a gun, blow your brains out.
Q. Dear Bruce, my girl friend says we don't do enough foreplay.
A. Geez mate, you had me stumped for a bit. I didn't recognise the word 'Foreplay'. Then it struck me, 'Fore' is what you shout in golf. Jeez mate, men don't play golf with women - but it's ok for her practice putting with your dick.
Q. Dear Bruce, I fooled around with a Kiwi and now I have a dose of the clap. What do I do ?
A. Deny, deny, deny, deny, deny and never ever, ever, ever, ever admit to rooting a Kiwi.
Q. Bruce, the boys are telling me there is such a thing as Dingo sex. What is it?
A. There are two types. The first one when you wake up next to a f*cking ugly Sheila and you chew your arm off to escape, rather than wake her, just like a dingo caught in a trap. And the other one is when you drink too much and your old boy...it Dingo hard and it dingo in.
Q. Dear Bruce I have some lucky condoms that I keep in my wallet. I am beginning to wonder if they really are lucky, as they have been there for two months
A. Jesus mate, no worries. Men only use rubbers when they are sober anyway. Guess that means you've been pissed for two months which makes you one lucky bastard! Just on a medical note - rubbers are good idea to use when you do an Abo, as they are smelly bastards, Oh and 'roos too, helps avoid bush rash.
Q. Dear Bruce my girlfriend got upset when I suggested I use an old girlfriend's vibrator on her.
A. No worries. I've seen this before. Women need reassuring. Tell the stupid bitch that you have cleaned it since you last used it. Sometimes Sheila's get hung up on hygiene.
Q. Dear Bruce I gave my sister one and now she wants me to do it to her mate.
A. Errr... mate you're from Tasmania right? No worries mate, as long as her mate is a Sheila it's ok.
Q. Dear Bruce, After my last Hockey game I got an erection in the showers. Is this normal, I am a single guy and like girls.
A. Nah mate you're queer. Only poofters play hockey.
Q. Dear Bruce, my wife says I don't use enough lubricant before we have sex.
A. Exactly how many beers are you drinking before you root her?
Q. Dear Bruce, I am beginning to suspect I am gay. I wear leather trousers and have just grown a Freddie Mercury moustache. I don't know who to turn to.
A. Get a grip of yourself man. Face facts, be logical: You're a raving poofter, no one likes you, get a gun, blow your brains out.
Q. Dear Bruce, my girl friend says we don't do enough foreplay.
A. Geez mate, you had me stumped for a bit. I didn't recognise the word 'Foreplay'. Then it struck me, 'Fore' is what you shout in golf. Jeez mate, men don't play golf with women - but it's ok for her practice putting with your dick.
Q. Dear Bruce, I fooled around with a Kiwi and now I have a dose of the clap. What do I do ?
A. Deny, deny, deny, deny, deny and never ever, ever, ever, ever admit to rooting a Kiwi.
Q. Bruce, the boys are telling me there is such a thing as Dingo sex. What is it?
A. There are two types. The first one when you wake up next to a f*cking ugly Sheila and you chew your arm off to escape, rather than wake her, just like a dingo caught in a trap. And the other one is when you drink too much and your old boy...it Dingo hard and it dingo in.
Have u grown?
How to tell you have grown up....
1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a single bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favourite song on an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of go out and break up.
8. You go from 130 days of holiday time to 14.
9. Jeans and a jumper no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Hungry Jacks closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
17. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
18. You go to the chemist for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
19. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
20. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
21. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never going to drink that much again."
22. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
23. You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
24. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you.
1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a single bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favourite song on an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of go out and break up.
8. You go from 130 days of holiday time to 14.
9. Jeans and a jumper no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Hungry Jacks closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
17. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
18. You go to the chemist for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
19. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
20. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
21. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never going to drink that much again."
22. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
23. You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
24. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you.
NewlyWeds
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar...you know... they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, puppy face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar... you know... there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, cutie pie?...
"LISTEN UP, DICKHEAD! DRINK YOUR F***ING BEER IN YOUR GODDAMN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR MOTHERF***ING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED NOW! YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, ASSHOLE?"
.......................and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a
sweet story?
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar...you know... they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, puppy face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
"You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.
"But my sweet honey... at the bar... you know... there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, cutie pie?...
"LISTEN UP, DICKHEAD! DRINK YOUR F***ING BEER IN YOUR GODDAMN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR MOTHERF***ING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED NOW! YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT, ASSHOLE?"
.......................and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a
sweet story?
Paradox of our time
The paradox of our time in history is that we
have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider
freeways, but narrower viewpoints.
We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little,drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We've added years to life not life to years.
We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the
street to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space but not inner space.
We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.
We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more
information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and
less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion,
big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but
broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable
diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies,
and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.
It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share
this insight, or to just hit delete.
Remember, spend some time with your loved ones,
because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word
to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will
grow up and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one
next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart
and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner
and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend
hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and
cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.
Give time to love,give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we
take,but by the moments that take our breath away.
have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider
freeways, but narrower viewpoints.
We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little,drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We've added years to life not life to years.
We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the
street to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space but not inner space.
We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.
We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more
information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and
less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion,
big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but
broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable
diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies,
and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.
It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share
this insight, or to just hit delete.
Remember, spend some time with your loved ones,
because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word
to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will
grow up and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one
next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart
and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner
and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend
hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and
cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.
Give time to love,give time to speak, and give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we
take,but by the moments that take our breath away.
MDC
A female reporter was conducting an interview with a farmer about Mad
Cow Disease.
"Mr. Brown, do you have any idea what might be the cause of the
disease?"
"Sure. Do you know the bulls only screw the cows once a year?"
"Umm, sir, that is a new piece of information, but what's the relationship between this and Mad Cow?"
"And did you know we milk the cows twice a day?"
"Mr. Brown, that's interesting, but, what's the point?"
"Lady, the point is this: if I'm playing with your tits twice a day, but only screwing you once a year, wouldn't you go mad, too?"
Cow Disease.
"Mr. Brown, do you have any idea what might be the cause of the
disease?"
"Sure. Do you know the bulls only screw the cows once a year?"
"Umm, sir, that is a new piece of information, but what's the relationship between this and Mad Cow?"
"And did you know we milk the cows twice a day?"
"Mr. Brown, that's interesting, but, what's the point?"
"Lady, the point is this: if I'm playing with your tits twice a day, but only screwing you once a year, wouldn't you go mad, too?"
BAYEE!!!!
About a century or two ago, the Pope decided
that all the Sikhs had to leave Italy.
Naturally there was a big uproar from the Sikh community.
So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate
with a member of the Sikh community.
If the Sikh won, the Sikhs could stay.
If the Pope won, the Sikhs would leave.
The Sikhs realized that they had no choice. Sothey picked a
middle-aged man named Harbinder Singh to represent
them.Harbinder asked for one addition to the debate.
To make it more interesting, neither side would be allowed
to talk! . The Pope agreed.
The day of the great debate came.
Harbinder Singh and the Pope sat opposite each other for a
full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.
Harbinder looked back at him and raised one finger.
The Pope waved his fingersin a circle around his head.
Harbinder pointed to the ground where he sat.
The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Harbinder pulled out an apple.
The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good.
The Sikhs can stay."
An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking
him what had happened.
The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the
holy trinity.
He responded by holding up one finger to remind
me that there was still one God common to both our religions."
"Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us.
He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us.
I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins.
He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin.
He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"
Meanwhile, the Sikh community had crowded around Harbinder Singh.
What happened?" they asked. "Well," said Harbinder,
"First he said to me that the Sikhs had three days to get out of here.
I told him f *@ k off and not one of us was leaving."
"Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Sikhs.
I let him know! that we were staying right here."
"Yes, yes, ...and then???" asked the crowd.
"I don't know",said Harbinder,
"He took out his lunch, and I took out mine!!!"
that all the Sikhs had to leave Italy.
Naturally there was a big uproar from the Sikh community.
So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate
with a member of the Sikh community.
If the Sikh won, the Sikhs could stay.
If the Pope won, the Sikhs would leave.
The Sikhs realized that they had no choice. Sothey picked a
middle-aged man named Harbinder Singh to represent
them.Harbinder asked for one addition to the debate.
To make it more interesting, neither side would be allowed
to talk! . The Pope agreed.
The day of the great debate came.
Harbinder Singh and the Pope sat opposite each other for a
full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.
Harbinder looked back at him and raised one finger.
The Pope waved his fingersin a circle around his head.
Harbinder pointed to the ground where he sat.
The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Harbinder pulled out an apple.
The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good.
The Sikhs can stay."
An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking
him what had happened.
The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the
holy trinity.
He responded by holding up one finger to remind
me that there was still one God common to both our religions."
"Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us.
He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us.
I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins.
He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin.
He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"
Meanwhile, the Sikh community had crowded around Harbinder Singh.
What happened?" they asked. "Well," said Harbinder,
"First he said to me that the Sikhs had three days to get out of here.
I told him f *@ k off and not one of us was leaving."
"Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Sikhs.
I let him know! that we were staying right here."
"Yes, yes, ...and then???" asked the crowd.
"I don't know",said Harbinder,
"He took out his lunch, and I took out mine!!!"
Chemistry?
ELEMENT: Women
SYMBOL: Wo
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted at 53.6 kg, but known to vary from 40-200 kg
OCCURRENCES: Copious quantities in all urban areas
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered in painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes w/o known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure applied in correct places
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, and a range of precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously w/o prior warning and for no apparent reason
4. Insoluble in liquids, but actively increases greatly in saturation of alcohol
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen
HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other
SYMBOL: Wo
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted at 53.6 kg, but known to vary from 40-200 kg
OCCURRENCES: Copious quantities in all urban areas
PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered in painted film
2. Boils at nothing; freezes w/o known reason
3. Melts if given special treatment
4. Bitter if incorrectly used
5. Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore
6. Yields if pressure applied in correct places
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has great affinity for gold, silver, and a range of precious stones
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances
3. May explode spontaneously w/o prior warning and for no apparent reason
4. Insoluble in liquids, but actively increases greatly in saturation of alcohol
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man
COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation
3. Very effective cleaning agent
TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen
HAZARDS:
1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other
WTF?
THE PERFECT DAY - FOR HER
8.15 Wake up to hugs and kisses.
8.30 Weigh in 2Kg lighter than yesterday.
8.45 Breakfast in bed, freshly squeezed orange juice and croissants - open presents - expensive jewellery chosen by thoughtful partner.
9.15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil.
10.00 Light work out at club with sexy funny personal trainer.
10.30 Facial, manicure, shampoo, condition, blow dry.
12.00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor cafe.
12.45 Catch sight of partner's ex and notices she has gained 17kg.
1.00 Shopping with friends, unlimited credit.
3.00 Nap.
4.00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist, card is from secret admirer.
4.15 Light work out at club, followed by massage from strong but gentle hunk, who says he rarely gets to work on such a perfect body.
5.30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe, parade before full length mirror.
7.30 Candle lit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments received from other diners/dancers.
10.00 Hot shower (alone).
10:50 Carried to bed . . . (freshly ironed, crisp, new, white linen).
11.00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling.
11.15 Fall asleep in his big strong arms.
THE PERFECT DAY - FOR HIM
6.00 Alarm.
6.15 Blow job.
6.30 Massive satisfying shit while reading the sports section.
7.00 Breakfast: rump steak and eggs, coffee and toast, all cooked by naked, buxom wench who bends over a lot showing her growler
7.30 Limo arrives.
7.45 Several Beers en-route to airport.
9.15 Flight in personal Lear Jet.
9.30 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job en-route).
9.45 Play front nine - 2 under.
11.45 Lunch - Pie, chips and gravy, 3 lagers and a bottle of Dom Perignon.
12.15 Blow job.
12.30 Play back nine - 4 under.
2.15 Limo back to the airport (Several Bourbons).
2.30 Fly to Cairns.
3.30 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female crew, all nude who also bend over a lot displaying growlers.
4.30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs) - on light tackle.
5.00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle McPherson bending over.. naturally).
6.45 Shit, Shower and Shave.
7.00 Watch news: Michael Jackson assassinated; cannabis legalised.
7.30 Dinner: lobster appetisers, Dom Perignon (1953), big juicy fillet steak followed by Ice-cream served on a big pair of tits.
9.00 Napoleon Brandy and Habanos cigar in front of wall-size TV as you watch match of the day; Boks beating Oz by 30 points
9.30 Sex with three women (all with lesbian tendencies... some bending over)
11.00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing ale.
11.30 A night cap blow job.
11.45 In bed alone.
11.50 A 22 second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room
11.51 Laugh yourself to sleep
8.15 Wake up to hugs and kisses.
8.30 Weigh in 2Kg lighter than yesterday.
8.45 Breakfast in bed, freshly squeezed orange juice and croissants - open presents - expensive jewellery chosen by thoughtful partner.
9.15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil.
10.00 Light work out at club with sexy funny personal trainer.
10.30 Facial, manicure, shampoo, condition, blow dry.
12.00 Lunch with best friend at fashionable outdoor cafe.
12.45 Catch sight of partner's ex and notices she has gained 17kg.
1.00 Shopping with friends, unlimited credit.
3.00 Nap.
4.00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist, card is from secret admirer.
4.15 Light work out at club, followed by massage from strong but gentle hunk, who says he rarely gets to work on such a perfect body.
5.30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe, parade before full length mirror.
7.30 Candle lit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments received from other diners/dancers.
10.00 Hot shower (alone).
10:50 Carried to bed . . . (freshly ironed, crisp, new, white linen).
11.00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling.
11.15 Fall asleep in his big strong arms.
THE PERFECT DAY - FOR HIM
6.00 Alarm.
6.15 Blow job.
6.30 Massive satisfying shit while reading the sports section.
7.00 Breakfast: rump steak and eggs, coffee and toast, all cooked by naked, buxom wench who bends over a lot showing her growler
7.30 Limo arrives.
7.45 Several Beers en-route to airport.
9.15 Flight in personal Lear Jet.
9.30 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job en-route).
9.45 Play front nine - 2 under.
11.45 Lunch - Pie, chips and gravy, 3 lagers and a bottle of Dom Perignon.
12.15 Blow job.
12.30 Play back nine - 4 under.
2.15 Limo back to the airport (Several Bourbons).
2.30 Fly to Cairns.
3.30 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female crew, all nude who also bend over a lot displaying growlers.
4.30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs) - on light tackle.
5.00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle McPherson bending over.. naturally).
6.45 Shit, Shower and Shave.
7.00 Watch news: Michael Jackson assassinated; cannabis legalised.
7.30 Dinner: lobster appetisers, Dom Perignon (1953), big juicy fillet steak followed by Ice-cream served on a big pair of tits.
9.00 Napoleon Brandy and Habanos cigar in front of wall-size TV as you watch match of the day; Boks beating Oz by 30 points
9.30 Sex with three women (all with lesbian tendencies... some bending over)
11.00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing ale.
11.30 A night cap blow job.
11.45 In bed alone.
11.50 A 22 second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room
11.51 Laugh yourself to sleep
10 ways to be a better couple
How To Be A Better Couple
10 steps to enjoying each other better...
1. Be realistic about each other.
Don't try to turn ur partner into something he or she is not. Let's face it, guys-there's only 1 Pamela Anderson in the world, and even she has had her implants removed! Give ur gal a break and understand that her physical appearance is NOT going to change overnite with the help of a few facials ! or treat ments. And ladies, Brad Pitt has already been taken, so u're gonna have to do with what ur guy is like! Chill out, love each other for what u are. There is more to ur partner than what meets the eye.
2. Always talk things out.
Now guys, I know this is not ur fave pastime or mode of resolving issues, but u know what? This works with the gals. Don't make assumptions about each other's feelings. Learn to xpress urself better so that ur partner undrstands what u're angry about, or hurt about, or even happy about! When u stop talking to each other from the heart, it's the beginning of the end.
3. Do stuff together.
Make an effort to do things together. Do some sports or involve urselves in some shared activities; something both of u enjoy or are interested in. It could be as simple as watching movies together, or jus strolling hand-in-hand down Orchard Road. Watch soccor with him once in a while though the green patch on TV puts u to sleep in 3 seconds. And guys, do give in if ur gal asks for another day at window-shopping, rather than suggest that she go out with her girlfriends for "that sort of activities" instead. If u're spending more time with ur friends rather than with ur partner, it's a warning sign that u're drifting apart!!!
4. Meet each other halfway.
If he agrees to throw out that rotten T-shirt with the "The_Rock" print, u shouldn't kick up much of a fuss if he asks u to keep ur room tidy. There's gotta be a little giving and taking in a relationship, so learn to meet each other halfway.
5.Show ur love
Buy her flowers or candy or perfume everynow and then, even if u have been together for 5years. It's wonderful to continue showing someone that u care for him or her. Cook him a special meal, paint him a Valentine's Day card. Knit him mini-socks he can't wear ( like for decoration purposes => ), buy him a packet of milk for breakfast, or pack his wardrobe for him...so he knows u can still be romantic and loving despite having been together for quite a while.
6. Respect each other.
Stop making jokes about her hair or skin, or whatever it is u love to laugh at. Ask urself if she thinks if its funny. And if he has an inferiority complex about his height, stop ogling at tall guys and make him feel worse! Love is about respecting each other's feelings and being sensitive to each other at all times.
7. Bury the past.
Stop bringing up the past. Gals..don't bring up the happy things about u and ur ex to ur guy, it would jus make him jealous or unhappy. And guys, don't talk about the happy times that u had with ur ex or mention about her in ur every other sentence as it would make ur gal feel un-happy and she might think that u saying all this b'cos u are gonna get back with ur ex or not interested in her anymore.< /P>
8. Sit on ur jealousy.
All of us go thru' spells of insecurity at the beginning of the relationship, but don't translate that insecurity into jealousy. If u're gonna go through ur partner's mail and cupboard, and eavesdropping on conversations, u know something is wrong - with u!!! Jealousy is like a poison that slowly spreads thru' the relationship before finally killing it. Trust ur partner; love has to have trust in it.
9. Keep ur commitments to each other.
If ur partner is standing u up all the time and cancelling dates and breaking promises, u need to talk! If u're in a relationship, make ur partner ur priority and don't disappoint them if u can help it. It's really terrible when someone promises to take u to dinner, and then calls to cancel it. Don't make promises u can't keep. If ur partner starts to feel that he/she is not important enough to u, u may jus lose him/her.
10. Be honest.
Honesty is not scowling at how awful she looks first thing in the morning, or telling him that he has the biceps of a fly~! When we say "be honest", we mean expressing ur feelings clearly, not being bitingly cruel. When u're hurt, say so, and when u're angry, tell him/her, w/o getting hysterical. If u can't be honest with ur partner, who can u be honest with? f Love is also about honesty, and a relationship where no honesty exists probabl! y isn't worth it!
10 steps to enjoying each other better...
1. Be realistic about each other.
Don't try to turn ur partner into something he or she is not. Let's face it, guys-there's only 1 Pamela Anderson in the world, and even she has had her implants removed! Give ur gal a break and understand that her physical appearance is NOT going to change overnite with the help of a few facials ! or treat ments. And ladies, Brad Pitt has already been taken, so u're gonna have to do with what ur guy is like! Chill out, love each other for what u are. There is more to ur partner than what meets the eye.
2. Always talk things out.
Now guys, I know this is not ur fave pastime or mode of resolving issues, but u know what? This works with the gals. Don't make assumptions about each other's feelings. Learn to xpress urself better so that ur partner undrstands what u're angry about, or hurt about, or even happy about! When u stop talking to each other from the heart, it's the beginning of the end.
3. Do stuff together.
Make an effort to do things together. Do some sports or involve urselves in some shared activities; something both of u enjoy or are interested in. It could be as simple as watching movies together, or jus strolling hand-in-hand down Orchard Road. Watch soccor with him once in a while though the green patch on TV puts u to sleep in 3 seconds. And guys, do give in if ur gal asks for another day at window-shopping, rather than suggest that she go out with her girlfriends for "that sort of activities" instead. If u're spending more time with ur friends rather than with ur partner, it's a warning sign that u're drifting apart!!!
4. Meet each other halfway.
If he agrees to throw out that rotten T-shirt with the "The_Rock" print, u shouldn't kick up much of a fuss if he asks u to keep ur room tidy. There's gotta be a little giving and taking in a relationship, so learn to meet each other halfway.
5.Show ur love
Buy her flowers or candy or perfume everynow and then, even if u have been together for 5years. It's wonderful to continue showing someone that u care for him or her. Cook him a special meal, paint him a Valentine's Day card. Knit him mini-socks he can't wear ( like for decoration purposes => ), buy him a packet of milk for breakfast, or pack his wardrobe for him...so he knows u can still be romantic and loving despite having been together for quite a while.
6. Respect each other.
Stop making jokes about her hair or skin, or whatever it is u love to laugh at. Ask urself if she thinks if its funny. And if he has an inferiority complex about his height, stop ogling at tall guys and make him feel worse! Love is about respecting each other's feelings and being sensitive to each other at all times.
7. Bury the past.
Stop bringing up the past. Gals..don't bring up the happy things about u and ur ex to ur guy, it would jus make him jealous or unhappy. And guys, don't talk about the happy times that u had with ur ex or mention about her in ur every other sentence as it would make ur gal feel un-happy and she might think that u saying all this b'cos u are gonna get back with ur ex or not interested in her anymore.< /P>
8. Sit on ur jealousy.
All of us go thru' spells of insecurity at the beginning of the relationship, but don't translate that insecurity into jealousy. If u're gonna go through ur partner's mail and cupboard, and eavesdropping on conversations, u know something is wrong - with u!!! Jealousy is like a poison that slowly spreads thru' the relationship before finally killing it. Trust ur partner; love has to have trust in it.
9. Keep ur commitments to each other.
If ur partner is standing u up all the time and cancelling dates and breaking promises, u need to talk! If u're in a relationship, make ur partner ur priority and don't disappoint them if u can help it. It's really terrible when someone promises to take u to dinner, and then calls to cancel it. Don't make promises u can't keep. If ur partner starts to feel that he/she is not important enough to u, u may jus lose him/her.
10. Be honest.
Honesty is not scowling at how awful she looks first thing in the morning, or telling him that he has the biceps of a fly~! When we say "be honest", we mean expressing ur feelings clearly, not being bitingly cruel. When u're hurt, say so, and when u're angry, tell him/her, w/o getting hysterical. If u can't be honest with ur partner, who can u be honest with? f Love is also about honesty, and a relationship where no honesty exists probabl! y isn't worth it!
A Message to all
Have you ever wondered which hurts the most?
Saying something and wishing you hadn't?
or saying nothing and wishing you had?
I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.
Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might
break your heart...if you don't, you might break theirs.
Have u ever decided not to become a couple because
you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person?
Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do.
It does it on its own.... when you least suspect it,
or even when you don't want it to.
Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had,
but that other perso n was too afraid to let you?
Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much...
for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.
Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle?
We tell lies when we are afraid...
afraid of what we don't know,
afraid of what others will think,
afraid of what will be found out about us.
But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.
Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.
Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done,
or could have had.
*What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say
good-bye?
*What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?
*What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you
never got to tell them how you felt?
(even if it is that you don't care anymore)
*What would you do if you loved someone
more than ever and you couldn't have them?
*What would you do if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?
People live, but people die.
And I want to tell you that you are a friend.
If you died tomorrow (God Forbid), you would be in my heart.
Would I be in yours?
We might be best friends one year,
pretty good friends the next year,
don't talk that often the next,
and don't want to talk at all the year after that.
So, I just wanted to say,
even if I never talk to you again in my life,
you are special to me and
you have made a difference in my life,
I look up to you,
respect you, and
truly cherish you.
Let old friends know you
haven't forgotten them,
and tell new friends you
never will.
Remember, every one needs a friend,
someday you might feel like you have
NO FRIENDS at all,
just remember this
and take comfort in knowing
somebody out there cares about you
and always will.
I LOVE YOU!!!!
Saying something and wishing you hadn't?
or saying nothing and wishing you had?
I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.
Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might
break your heart...if you don't, you might break theirs.
Have u ever decided not to become a couple because
you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person?
Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do.
It does it on its own.... when you least suspect it,
or even when you don't want it to.
Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had,
but that other perso n was too afraid to let you?
Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much...
for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.
Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle?
We tell lies when we are afraid...
afraid of what we don't know,
afraid of what others will think,
afraid of what will be found out about us.
But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.
Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.
Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done,
or could have had.
*What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say
good-bye?
*What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?
*What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you
never got to tell them how you felt?
(even if it is that you don't care anymore)
*What would you do if you loved someone
more than ever and you couldn't have them?
*What would you do if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?
People live, but people die.
And I want to tell you that you are a friend.
If you died tomorrow (God Forbid), you would be in my heart.
Would I be in yours?
We might be best friends one year,
pretty good friends the next year,
don't talk that often the next,
and don't want to talk at all the year after that.
So, I just wanted to say,
even if I never talk to you again in my life,
you are special to me and
you have made a difference in my life,
I look up to you,
respect you, and
truly cherish you.
Let old friends know you
haven't forgotten them,
and tell new friends you
never will.
Remember, every one needs a friend,
someday you might feel like you have
NO FRIENDS at all,
just remember this
and take comfort in knowing
somebody out there cares about you
and always will.
I LOVE YOU!!!!
An Answer
The Bible says to have an answer for why you believe, to those who ask you. This is a good example of an answer to one of the most common reasons people give for ignoring God and His goodness.
A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe that God exists."
Why do you say that?" asked the customer.
"Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things."
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument. The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop. Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber: "You know what? Barbers do not exist."
"How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!"
"No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."
Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is people do not come to me."
”Exactly!" affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! What happens is people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."
A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed. As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation. They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: "I don't believe that God exists."
Why do you say that?" asked the customer.
"Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist. Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children? If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain. I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things."
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument. The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop. Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber: "You know what? Barbers do not exist."
"How can you say that?" asked the surprised barber. "I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!"
"No!" the customer exclaimed. "Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside."
Ah, but barbers DO exist! What happens is people do not come to me."
”Exactly!" affirmed the customer. "That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! What happens is people don't go to Him and do not look for Him. That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world."
Do u know how blessed r u?
If you woke up this morning
with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the
million who won't survive the week.
If you have never experienced
the danger of battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture or
the pang s of starvation,
you are ahead of 20 million people
around the world.
If you attend a church meeting
without fear of harassment,
arrest, torture, or death,
you are more blessed than almost
three billion people in the world.
If you have food in your refrigerator,
clothes on your back,a roof over
your head and a place to sleep,
you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank,
in your wallet, and spare change
in a dish someplace, you are among
the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
If your parents are still married and alive,
you are very rare,
especially in the United States.
If you hold up your head with a smile
on your face and are truly thankful,
you are blessed because the majority can,
but most do not.
If you can hold someone's hand, hug them
or even touch them on the shoulder,
you are blessed because you can
offer God's healing touch.
If you can read this message,
you are more blessed than over
two billion people in the world
that cannot read anything at all.
You are so blessed in ways
you may never even know....
with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the
million who won't survive the week.
If you have never experienced
the danger of battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture or
the pang s of starvation,
you are ahead of 20 million people
around the world.
If you attend a church meeting
without fear of harassment,
arrest, torture, or death,
you are more blessed than almost
three billion people in the world.
If you have food in your refrigerator,
clothes on your back,a roof over
your head and a place to sleep,
you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank,
in your wallet, and spare change
in a dish someplace, you are among
the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
If your parents are still married and alive,
you are very rare,
especially in the United States.
If you hold up your head with a smile
on your face and are truly thankful,
you are blessed because the majority can,
but most do not.
If you can hold someone's hand, hug them
or even touch them on the shoulder,
you are blessed because you can
offer God's healing touch.
If you can read this message,
you are more blessed than over
two billion people in the world
that cannot read anything at all.
You are so blessed in ways
you may never even know....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)